I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Randomize
