He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
