he wants to bone in the snuggie
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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