Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
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