There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.