Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize