I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
