I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Randomize
