Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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