4 words: hood of his car
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize