I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
