so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
