The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
