Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
we made out on top of his cat.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
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May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
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She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.