I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Less talking, more tequila
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Randomize
