I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Randomize
