I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
