weddingsv make me drug and hornr
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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