did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize