So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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