Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize