Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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