I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
the day after is always just damage control
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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