That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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