did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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