the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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