is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
