worst night to have a conscience
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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