omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
