I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
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