just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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