Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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