Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
