i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
