No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
