Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
