still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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