i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
