I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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