What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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