I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
