I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it