I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize
