My brain says no but my pants say off.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
