She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
