can u get pink eye on your cock?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
