I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize