Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
True strength comes from lack of pants
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
