Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
