so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
