we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Randomize
