There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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