I think scott just propositioned me for sex
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
