I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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